The Children years:

Some people may manage to combine the “Children Years” with adventure.  I mostly managed mis-adventure.

In 1969, when my son, Sean was born, the three of us went to Managua, Nicaragua to visit my in-laws, who were working and living there.  We took lots of day trips and saw much of the countryside, but mostly I spent the time taking care of a cranky 3-month-old who had just learned to turn over from his stomach to his back but couldn’t go the other way.

When Sean was 9-month-old, Tom wanted visit his family in California.  We had 10 days off from work but not enough money to fly.  Therefore, we drove for 3 days in each direction and had 4 days with the family.  This would have been an overly ambitious and difficult trip in any case but with baby in tow, it was hell.  Tom did all of the driving and I took care of Sean, who had just learned to walk. 12 hours a day in the car for 2,200 miles was definitely not what he wanted to do. 

In 1973, Maggie was born and the adventure scale dipped even lower. Car trips became more unnerving with two kids in the back fighting.  I wince at the memory. All I wanted to do was stay home where it was easier to care for my kids.  

The exception to my stay-at-home attitude came in the guise of two international trips without the kids.  The first was to Germany by way of London in 1970 to meet Tom on his way back from Egypt. The second was to Israel in 1976 to see family and friends.

Tom had been away in Egypt for 4 months as part of an archaeological team and asked me to meet him in Germany on his way back to the United States. My mom and dad offered to take care of 8-month-old Sean for two weeks.  My flight to Germany allowed a stop in London and I decided to arrange a 24-hour stopover there. I never traveled on my own before and had no clue that I could have arranged lodging and transportation to and from the airport ahead of time.  I had no travel maps or a guidebook and was totally unprepared.  It was a bit scary to be in a strange country, but also very exciting.  I managed to get around London and enjoyed the freedom of deciding just where to go. I did learn a valuable travel lesson – the pain of jet lag.  I had been very excited on the plane to London and stayed awake most of the night watching movies.  I arrived in London in the early morning and by 5PM, I was exhausted and went to sleep.  Unfortunately, I then woke up at midnight and could not get back to sleep.  Bad move.  When I travel now, I sleep on the plane then I stay awake until at least 9 PM at my destination (or take a short afternoon nap).  I rarely have serious jet lag problems with this formula. 

Once in Germany, we stayed with family and friends and were well taken care of at each location.  I loved seeing castles and the countryside.

My other international trip was to visit Israel by myself after an absence of 20 years.  I loved being in Israel.  I had been very homesick and it was wonderful to walk around Tel Aviv and try to recapture memories.  So much had changed over the 20 years, but our old apartment building was still there, as well as the park near the house.  My old school, which stood all alone when I attended it, was now squashed between tall modern hotels – it is located in prime real estate area across the street from the Mediterranean Sea.  

We had traveled so little when I was living in Israel, therefore I was eager to see more.

Nili in front of the Wailing Wall, Jerusalem.

Swimming in the Dead Sea was a fun experience.  The salty water actually does help a person float. I knew then, that I would be back.

My life changed dramatically over the next decade.  I divorced, married Jerry Vetowich and acquired a stepson, Stefan, who lived with us 50% of the time.  I went back to school and earned an MBA in accounting at Rutgers University, and changed careers from teaching at a pre-school to a finance position at a major corporation.  

My second honeymoon was very different from the first.  This time I was not looking for adventure – I was looking for rest and relaxation as well as romance.  My parents took care of the children for a week and we flew to Aruba.  It was perfect – no dead birds and open sewers, just lovely beaches and good food.

As the children grew older, we ventured forth again, taking modest trips.  Vacations were child centered with visits to family in Chicago and Michigan as well as to such destinations as Bush Gardens and Disney World.  Most of those trips were car trips because we could not afford flights for 5 people.  Of-course car trips with the children were always full of noise and liveliness as well as fights and boredom.

I wanted to introduce Jerry and the children to my birthplace, therefore I began to plan a family trip to Israel. I spent months before the trip prepping the children about what they would see and what it means to me. Packing for a plane trip for 5 people plus camping equipment was quite a feat.  We had two tents, 5 sleeping bags, cooking utensils and clothes.  We rented a jeep like van with no air-conditioning (trying to save money).  

We drove south from Tel Aviv to Eilat, the southernmost point in Israel, on the Red Sea.  Eilat is a lovely resort town with lovely beaches and a great aquarium, but it was not an ideal place to camp.  It was very, very hot all day and we could not go into the tent until late in the evening when the air had cooled.  On the plus side the campground was conveniently located, just a short walk to the beach.  In addition to the difficult camping, we had another misadventure:  Sean jumped from a bridge into the water and stepped on a sea urchin.  It was very painful at the time, but worsened and eventually required medical help, when the urchin’s needles in his foot became infected.  Luckily, health care in Israel was very good and inexpensive. 

From Eilat we drove north to Masada and the Dead Sea.  Masada is a fortress in the desert where Jewish zealots held out against the invading Romans and died as martyrs.  We chose to hike up to the top of the hill and it was wonderful.  The kids could really appreciate the story by seeing where it happened.  

Stefan, Sean Nili and Maggie overlooking Jerusalem

We camped at Kibbutz Ramat Rachel, just about 10 minutes from Jerusalem, in a beautiful grassy campground.  We had a choice of cooking our own food or eating in their dining room.  Attached to the campground was a wonderful water park.  We had a delightful break from sightseeing, spending a day at the water park.

We ended the trip in Tel-Aviv, in a 3- star hotel near the beach (the hotel is no longer there).  We visited my extensive family in TA as well as spent time at the lovely TA beach.  We all felt that we had had a wonderful adventure.  It left such lovely memories that both Maggie and Stefan returned to Israel when they were in college. 

The Empty Nest Years

The children left home and the day-to-day responsibilities (though not financial responsibilities) for the children were over.  All of the sudden we could go wherever and whenever we wanted to go without having to find childcare.  We were on our own with no children and no pets. 

Unfortunately, (or fortunately) I had climbed high enough on the corporate ladder to make it difficult to take vacations for longer than a week at a time. Jerry had left the corporate world, and was working for a small company that was depending on him, therefore, he could not leave for any length of time either. Our adventures had to be local or short.

But adventure was calling, therefore, we perfected the art of short trips; going to Paris for a 4-day weekend, flying to Israel for a week, or taking a 5-day Bermuda cruise.  

Some of my travels were work related.  Our company had its international finance headquarters in Geneva and I made many trips to that lovely city.  I also had the opportunity to go to Turkey on business.  Jerry tagged along for the sightseeing portion of the trip.  

These trips wetted my appetite to see more of the world, but my work schedule would not permit going too far or for too long.  I began to look toward retirement as an opportunity for travel.